Confused. So confused

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Ummahatul Masruhah

what is this?

what kind of feeling which I feel now?

what is this?

I don't really understand

So gloomy

This feeling makes me so eager to do anything, so my perfect plans just keep on my head. Staying on head with high volume of songs on my ear. Not productive? Hmm.. maybe

I feel blue in the dark blue sky. Because of? I don't know.

But I feel blue lately :"""

I like to listen music with high volume. In that way I can ignore everything and I can be busy with my ruin feel on my heart. With my problem on head. Or many ideas and plans which run on my head and then I sort those plans, which is the one I should do first.

BTW, I am so confused with my project. 

I think Umakuma still ambiguous yet. Will that about accessories? I think yes, because I've post some types of bracelets that I've made. Will that about clothes? Maybe, I really excited if I see a pict which in those pict there's a women who wear cloth. I'll focus on her cloth. I'll pay my attention on her cloth she wear. But if it will about clothes, it will hard. I don't have many knowledge about types of fabric. So, if I want my organismic (okay, the effect of personality psychology -_-) cloth will be like those I don't know what type of fabric I should choose. And.. and I can't use sewing machine. My stepmother has a manual sewing machine at her home. But she can't teach me, because she only can sew really simple design hmm. I don't have much time to learn how to use sewing machine and how to make a cloth pattern. And..and if I ask tailor to join with me I doubt her/him. Because? They have their own job, and I doubt about how they do my demand on time. I ever told this problem with my father. And he said that it will depend on how much money will you give to them, if you give more, your demand will do fast (so, the price of my clothes will be high??????????? in fact my brand is still new, still not popular, OMG!!!!!!!!)

But, lately I am so curious and excited with drawing. I am so excited if I stalked an account on instagram which post many draws or paints. Will it be nice if I use those unique draws on a shirt or tote bag? Hmm... I'll think it again. Hmm...